Iris, Hyper Neutrino

{3}: Put a charge counter on Iris.
Remove three charge counters from Iris: Iris deals 1 damage to each creature and each player. Then each player gets a rad counter.

Partner with Pat, Particle Acceptor (When Iris enters the battlefield, search your library for Pat, reveal her, put her into your hand, then shuffle your library.)

It's only a war crime if you lose.